Why am I still SINGLE?

 Still Single...

I truly enjoy my singleness and love how I do not have to deal with arguments, disagreements, responsibilities, and sacrifices. For those who are married, I sometimes pity them because I am enjoying my life by doing whatever I want, buy whatever I want, do whatever I want with no ones permission, and make choices whatever I want. My money is only being spent on myself and my parents. I do not have to be anywhere else with force and be a free woman. For those who have kids, I also pity them sometimes. When people are hanging out, they can no longer play do to their kids sickness, nap time, or other obligations. Too bad they can't do what singles can do. I don't have to be at home at a certain time to cook, clean, or etc. I can do whatever I want.

... maybe this is why I am still single. I am not ready.

I don't know how to cook, clean, love, or nurture. All I know is to think about myself. I am the main actor in this life who just doesn't care about anyone else but me.

... this is why I am still single. I am not ready.

... but I am also sick and tired of this chapter in my life. How long will I be stuck in this chapter? When will this chapter end? When will I meet my other half and start a new chapter together? Do I not have anyone with me in the future? Will I not have a family of my own? Am I going to be single all my life? I am sick and tired of being single.

I am now 31... living with my parents and single.

Why can't I find someone? 

I want to date for 1-2 years, be engaged for a year, and get married.

BUT how can I do that if I am already 31?!

Why is it so hard to meet someone and settle? 

I am not being picky. There is seriously NO ONE to even open up to.

I am tired... I want to change... I want to start a new chapter... I am sick and tired....